"This" by Darius Rucker
Ever feel like you just can't catch a break? Nothing seems to be going your way? Have you ever heard no so many times it starts to lose its meaning?
I have. In the last two years, I have heard "no" so many times, I have learned to laugh and look for the next open door. When I first started hearing "no" it was a foreign concept to me. All my life I worked hard for what I had - job, grades, academic standing - and then I put one foot into the real world, and for some reason none of my achievements carried much weight. Crazy how that works, isn't it? But over the last two years, I have learned the blessing in "no."
- Applied to grad school at Texas Tech. No
- Applied to 11 other grad schools (About the eighth letter, I started laughing instead of crying.) 11 No's
- Moved back home and applied for A LOT of jobs A LOT of No's
- Wanted to move out of state No
- Applied for more jobs and internships More No's
Starting to get the picture? No started to lose its meaning. I don't hold any resentment or anger towards those who told me no. They were just sending me another direction and, in a weird way, helping me find my way. Know what happened when I stopped trying to make things happen and allowed the Lord to direct my steps? A lot of those "No's" became "Yes's" in directions I never would have explored.
- Got a acceptance letter to Focus on the Family Institute in the same month I was rejected from Tech. The Lord changed my life. Yes
- Found a freelance writing position two days after my most recent job rejection. Yes
- Attended a writer's conference and was accepted into a writing course with a mentor doing the exact same thing a graduate degree in writing would have given me for an eighth of the cost. Yes
- Attended another conference and found agents and editors who are interested in my book. At least I am on the right track. Yes
The Lord began to open doors to all the things I had been pursuing, except He determined the direction! I feel like I am in pretty good company. In the Bible:
The Lord told Abraham to leave everything He knew and travel to a land He would show him. Abraham prayed for a child, and the Lord said "no" until Abraham was so old it seemed impossible, and then the Lord gave Abraham, Isaac, the promised child.
Jonah didn't want to go to Nineveh to preach. He ran away but the Lord said "no" to Jonah's direction. He sent a whale to swallow him and then spit him up on the beach near Nineveh. It changed that city.
Mary probably expected to go into her marriage a pristine virgin with no children. The Lord said "no" to that plan. She was still a virgin, but she was shamed by her people with a child, who turned out to be the Christ child - the One who changed the world.
My "No's" seem pretty insignificant in the grand scheme of things. The Lord used all those "No's" in the Bible for His glory and redirected all these people to a better path. There is blessing in "no."
"In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps." Proverbs 16:9. I follow my own way so much. But the Lord wants to tell me YES. He just wants to do it in His own time and in His own way. Just as He has been faithful in all His covenants and promises in the Bible until now, I know that He will be faithful to answer my "No's" as "Yes's" in far better ways than I could. They never look like what I thought or planned. They are always, always better.
Trust Him with your "No's." They are blessings in disguise! He is so FAITHFUL!
Excited to see where He leads next,
Kariss
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