Monday, July 8, 2013

A Season of Change

I tend to view my life in chapters, which probably isn't a real shocker since I'm a writer. But this year of my life doesn't seem to have a clear cut pattern with the exception of one word - change.

Without a doubt, I am a creature of habit, and while some change is exciting, change that rocks my world in every area really challenges me.

Since my last post, I've moved to an apartment in the city. With a new location has come changes in relationships, schedules, and habits. I've accepted the invitation to join another community group as my current group prepares to transition into a new season. My first book is receiving the final touches and book 2 is heavy on my mind.

All of these changes are great, but I'm so overwhelmed. This is a year of curve balls from the Lord, and I feel like I have to make a daily conscious decision to just roll with each pitch. Definitely a year of chipping off rough edges and reshaping this piece of clay.

It's so hard to release control of plans and hopes and desires. It's so hard to balance the good things and say "no" in favor of better things. It's hard to let go.

I feel very scattered and out of control, but isn't that where Jesus likes us best? He is peace in the chaos, shelter in the storm, constant in the change, faithful in providing, present in the loneliness, direction in the fog.

He is SOVEREIGN.

That's the trait I am coming to understand in a greater way this year. It isn't this emotional characteristic. It's powerful. He works all things for my good, continually aligning my heart with His so that His desires become Mine. It somehow makes the change make sense.

I'm half way through the year, and I have no idea what to expect. I'm learning to daily trust His hand and savor the moments He gives me. And I might just be thankful when my life attains some sense of normalcy or familiarity again. But regardless, I'm letting go and trusting He knows my heart as this chapter continues.