A Time to Retreat

It's been over a month since I posted. Over a month since I signed my contract. And two full months of craziness. This is the busiest season of my life, and it seems like the Lord decided to answer a whole lot of prayers all at once. 

Without the ability to take time off, my brain has existed in a constant state of scrambled eggs. I eat, sleep, and dream writing, editing, and my to-do list.

But this weekend, I tasted the sweet freedom of retreat. No writing, no editing. Just rest and fellowship. 

I am a member of a young adult group in Dallas called The Porch. Without fail every week I am in awe of the hearts of these young adults to change Dallas for Christ. 

I serve on one of several teams that keep the wheels turning every week. This past weekend, we decided to escape the traffic and city noise and distraction and just be still and be with one another. 

INCREDIBLE.

For the first time in a while, I realized and tasted what heaven will be like some day. We talked, we laughed, we worshipped...a lot, we prayed, we spent time in the Word. Most of it was impromptu which made it much sweeter. I heard stories that broke my heart and stories that made me want to cheer because of the goodness of God. I experienced the bonds of friendship grow stronger, iron sharpen iron. I learned personalities and passions and preferences that made me value all the more that we serve such a creative God.

Most of all, we dreamed about how to make the Porch better, how to be more effective, and how to change our city - one life at a time.

What does it look like for us to love well and lead well? What if changing Dallas starts with us? What if we are of one heart and mind, united in our purpose, and bold about the gospel of Jesus Christ?

Can 100 plus Porch volunteers change Dallas? 

Yes. It can start with us. I pray this weekend is just the beginning of beautiful things.

"All the believers were one in heart and mind. No one claimed that any of their possessions was their own, but they shared everything they had. With great power the apostles continued to testify to the resurrection of the Lord Jesus. And God’s grace was so powerfully at work in them all." Acts 4:32-33

Thankful Heart Day 18 - A Church Home

Just over 2 years ago, I stumbled into Watermark Community Church, craving community, something familiar, and something stable. I had just moved home from college and needed a fresh start in my home city. I needed a place to spread my wings and grow.

It didn't take me long to feel at home in this place. I always leave challenged and encouraged. Many days, I leave frustrated because of the biblical accountability...which is how I know it's working.

Every week, without fail, I am either privileged to see lives changed or hear stories of life change from those around me.

I have seen broken people made into beautiful, confident warriors for Christ. And, I am so honored to call them friends and serve with them in ministry.

This place is home. These people are family. We disagree, but we are learning to love one another well. We challenge one another with the gospel message, and we push one another to share it. We pray for one another and pray God does BIG things in our city.

I know this isn't unique to my church. But, I can't help but think it is something special, simply because I get to see what God does using the people here every week. On this beautiful Sunday morning, I am thankful that I walked in those doors 2 years ago. And I'm thankful for how the Lord has changed my life in that time. He is so good!

Thankful Heart Day 6 - I Voted!

I voted! I actually voted a couple weekends ago.

But today, I'm thankful for the freedom to exercise my rights.

Everyone seems to have an opinion "based on facts," but the facts seem to discount one another. Get a grip, people. After a while, your emotional response gets annoying.

My pastor said something very wise this past Sunday: The only election of eternal significance is the election into God's family. 

I love what Daniel 2 says about my God, "He changes times and seasons; He sets up kings and deposes them. He gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to the discerning."

Pray for wisdom and discernment for our leaders. God is Sovereign over whoever wins, and no matter what comes, He will get glory. Pray. Vote for issues that align with the Bible. CHILL OUT. And let's see what God does.

"Righteousness exalts a nation, but sin condemns any people." (Proverbs 14:34) Vote for what's right and pleasing to God!

Beating My Best

 In my past life, I was a band nerd.

Okay, maybe it wasn't my past life. Maybe it was just a few short years ago. But it is a title I claim proudly because I love music and I loved playing my clarinet. Every day was a challenge. I worked hard to make my fingers and tongue move in perfect rhythm. Many felt the need to compete. I felt the pressure, but my band director had a phrase that he often told our band:

"Your main goal in this competition is to be Poteet (that was us). If you can beat what we were this time last year, you will have accomplished our goal."

I still remember that admonishment. While I am not the most competitive person, I do understand the need to beat myself. I don't need to be the best, but I do need to be my best. I constantly push myself to beat my previous standard of "best," and in this way, I am always growing.

Mr. Jones was another of my band directors. He taught me to play my clarinet and was present and active in my life from the time I entered middle school until I graduated. He was my silent cheerleader. I never knew how much until recently.

When I graduated, Mr. Jones gave me a book written by John Maxwell called, Developing the Leader Within You.  This book teaches leadership skills rooted strongly in Maxwell's faith in Christ. When I went to college, I attempted to read this book, knowing that Mr. Jones had given it to me for a reason. It was above my head as an 18-year-old who was only focused on making good grades and meeting new people. I've recently read through it, and value the lessons I have learned. But I value something else even more.

In the front of the book, Mr. Jones wrote me a letter. Several lines stuck out to me and have bridged the 5 years since I was his student. "As you embark on this new journey, I know you take a strong faith in the Lord and His teachings. I have no doubt that you will bring Him much glory! I pray that you will hold steadfast to His promises even in the hard times."

Mr. Jones believed in me before I believed in myself, before I recognized the hardships life would throw my way, before I realized my own leadership potential, or before I realized that Maxwell's words would help me grow in my people skills and my faith. Mr. Jones challenged me throughout my teen years and his words continue to challenge me today. Hard times have hit, and I am clinging to the Lord for dear life, just as Mr. Jones prayed I would.

He left me with a verse that I leave you with today, "Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain." 1 Corinthians 15:58

I pray whatever you do brings God glory, that your hardships point you to the goodness of God, and that you remember that what you do for the Lord is never in vain. I pray that you don't compare yourselves to others but constantly push yourself to excel beyond what you were previously capable. Beat your best and stand firm in the Lord.

HE IS FAITHFUL.

New Chapter, New Me.

I began this blog last June at the suggestion of some of the ladies who were mentoring me at Focus. My intent was to chart my journey...what God has been teaching me. That month marked a new chapter for me, a chapter of leaving college a year early and being launched into the real world after being rejected from Texas Tech grad school (which I had taken for granted), and with no real direction other than I needed a job so I could reapply for grad school.

It's funny how all the plans I make seem to fall through. This time last year, I would have been angry about that. Well, not would have been...I was. Right now there is acceptance and surrender. I still don't know what the Lord is doing but I love the verse in Nahum that says "The Lord is GOOD, a stronghold in the day of trouble and He knows those who trust in Him."

So after 11 rejection letters from graduate programs, a handful of rejections from internships, a full year spent in Lubbock when I only planned on 5 months, and a very full car and long drive move back to Dallas, I have come to a very interesting conclusion. Nothing in the last year has changed. I still don't know where I am going to be 2 months from now, 6 months, a year. I still don't have a full time job. I'm still pursuing applications and career options but I am back where I was last June.

Except for this very important fact. I'm not that girl anymore. Last June, I began these posts very bitter, angry, disappointed, feeling a failure. This time this year, I have felt all those things in the last year all over again, but the difference is I didn't cling to them. I saw what they did in my life...they were pure POISON. No other way to put it. It affected my relationships with my friends, my family, my joy over graduating, everything. After having tasted it, I wanted no part of it this year.

The Lord broke me last summer. Completely and totally. I remember going back to my apartment one night, closing and locking the dead bolt so my roommates wouldn't walk in, and then yelling at God, crying, and raging. I wanted my career path to glorify Him, I wanted to learn and grow, I had thought I was following His plan but none of it got me the end results I wanted. But again, nothing has changed. God is still God and I am no more in control today then I was last summer. Who knows why I applied to 11 schools and didn't get in? But here's a thought...who knows how He used my stories in the lives of the acceptance committees who had to read the Christian content in my stories? Who knows how the Lord could have used that? If I hadn't applied for those schools or committed to my college minister to go back to Lubbock simply to lead a small group college Bible study, the Lord may not have changed me in the same way.

Still no direction. Still no job. Still not sure why I needed to move back home. But of this I am sure. My Jesus hasn't changed.I am beginning a new chapter once again and the title is not yet written. I am excited. I am no longer the girl of last summer. My heart has been changed, softened, assured.

Stay tuned as the my never changing God walks with me into this new phase. He is Good.

Celebrating His goodness,
Kare

The steadfast love of the Lord never changes, His mercies never come to an end. They are new every morning, great is Your faithfulness. "The Lord is my portion," says my soul," and I will HOPE in Him."

My 2.5 Week Challenge

I think God often laughs at me. Seriously, I think He does. I seem to have a problem with thinking that I know it all and He is constantly laughing, shaking His head, and gently saying, "Sweetheart, you can't even begin to fathom the plans I have for you. Stop trying to figure it out and stop thinking that you know what is best for you. I have something so much better in mind." When I started leading this Endeavor group through my church, (Endeavor is a group of sophomore leaders that I am co-leading to teach them leadership skills and equip and encourage them to lead small group freshmen Bible studies)I prayed that God would use me, but I really didn't think that He was going to teach me much. That was my first mistake. God seems to teach me humility in spades...and I am so glad that He does.

This past week in Endeavor we discussed solitude. If you have been keeping up with me at all, you will understand when I say that stillness and solitude are not my strongest abilities. In the past few years of college, I have grown very uncomfortable with stillness. I have this mistaken notion that if I am relaxing I am missing out on something I should be completing, and so even when I am relaxing, I am working. This is a huge problem. This week, I realized that I suffer from "hurrying disease" and I must ruthlessly eliminate it from my life. I do not like the quiet because it offers time to think about things that I frankly just do not want to deal with. But, I was reminded this last Sunday that "I can't go faster than the One who is leading" as our book said, and if I try, I miss out on the things He wants to teach me in the quiet and still moments of my life.

Again, it comes back to being still. So, we challenged our Endeavor leaders to practice solitude and eliminating hurry from their lives in some form or fashion over the next two weeks. So for the next two and half weeks (since I will miss a Sunday with them) I am committing and challenging myself to practice solitude and remember the beauty that comes in the stillness. I am committing to seeing how God moves and what He wants to teach me in the quiet, unhurried moments of my life. So I will deliberately turn the TV and radio off more and spend some time every day journaling on top of my time with the Lord. Last night, I spent an hour doing this and it was a sweet time of fellowship with my Savior. But it was not an easy thing and I was constantly thinking about what I had to do and about what movie I wanted to watch as I finished up a few things. So we will see what God does. After all, if I can't be still enough to hear Him in the quiet, how in the world can I expect to discern His voice in the chaos of my life?

Listening for His voice,
Kar